Lately I have had mixed feelings about the wall. More specifically, plenty of good people arrive at our borders daily, and deserve a shot at becoming productive citizens. However, I think we can all agree that border security can use some bolstering. We are trying out a new path to citizenship, and we think it works, however, it only applies to females. It goes something like this: if you can get slapped around, take a wicked face fucking, balls to the chin, spit roasted, hurl chunks, have it poured on your head all the while reciting the Pledge of Allegiance, you’re in. Let’s all welcome this hard working Latina with open arms. She earned it.